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Emotional Intelligence January 11, 2011

Posted by izzyholt in Motivation, Self Help.
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If we only knew the best way to handle all situations in our life; our life would be much more satisfying and we certainly would be known as having a bit of emotional intelligence.  With that said, sadly, we do not know all there is to know about being able to master all things; period, but if we choose we can teach ourselves to be better equipped to handle stressed situations more proficiently and without chaos.

There are however, many people who are as calm as a cucumber in heated events in the workplace and elsewhere.  They simply do not get alarmed, scream and yell or throw up their hand and start blaming; when something goes wrong.  These are the people who seem to know that the best way to handle a stressful situation is to remain, coherent, and in tune with how to resolve the issue.  It seems they have taught themselves that getting upset and pounding on a co-worker or employee, is absolutely out of line and doesn’t resolve anything.  They know that their behavior sets the tone for the entire group, and if they are calm and show resolve; others will also.  This indicates these minority of people, basically are in the know how of managing people; they know that being a leader requires one to be just that,  a leader. 

Emotional Intelligence can be explained this way:   A person who has figured out who they are.  They are not out to prove who they are or what they know.  They have simply mastered their own personal abilities of controlling their emotions and realize their emotions will affect those around them.  Therefore they know how to manage people well. They have mastered their ability to gain respect, confidence and co-operation from their constituents because they stay in full control, most of the time.   

Remember we said, no one knows how to handle all situations, and for the most part, they do not, but some can master this more than others.  We can know all their is to know about our profession but if we do not know how to relate to other individuals on the basis of care and consideration;  we have missed the boat.  When people look at how we react to any situation; they judge us.  If we cry, they say we are weak.  If we throw tantrums, we are unstable.  If we are calm, cool, sincere and collected; we are named as being in control and someone who is in charge of who we are.

Having Emotional Intelligence, means that we pay attention and are able to spot other peoples needs, not just our own.  Being in control gives one power.  Power to listent to what is being said, not just by words, but in actions as well.  Some people who have not yet gained their personal worth, may feel inadequate about speaking out about how they feel about an issue.  Their actions actually protray what they do not say; some times.  In other words; a person who is quiet all the time, never voices their opinion is usually self conscious.   That does not mean they do not have a worthy opinion, but it can means they do not feel comfortable in the crowd they are in to voice it.  The Emotionally Intelligent Manager, can spot this and bring out that knowledge that is locked up and help both the company and the employee.

This is real leadership and not just management.  Being emotionally intelligent is growing in all facets of emloyment.


Life Isn’t Perfect October 13, 2010

Posted by izzyholt in Motivation.
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Life can’t be perfect; it isn’t and it will never be.  Having said that; if we never had a worry or concern in our life we would not appreciate the good things that life brings.  We have all had our ups and downs and rounds of sorrow, regrets and dissappointments, and without these we would not have become more tolerant of other peoples sorrows.  It is by these that we grow into being better individuals. After all, if we can learn the importance of tolerance in our lives; we become more stable and able humans to help others and also carry our own load of troubles. 

Life is wonderfully not all trouble……thank goodness.  It it were we would not only not be able to bear it but, we would not want to live a long life either.  There is a balance that we must gain and when down we should remember the good times and give the God of all humans thanks for the good.  We seem to forget to do that.  Humans we are!  By being thankful for the many good things in life that overshadow the bad; we are able to know that at some point whatever we are going through will somehow come to an end and it will give us courage to keep holding on during the not so positive situations.  It gives us courage and hope for a brighter day which we know will come in time.

When finding faith to go on is hard; we must look for new strength and ways to relish on the times that we have had what had seemed to good to be true.  Faith is something that we should always keep renewed because if we lose faith; it is hard to keep believing in anything.  “Faith is the substance of things hoped for; the evidence of things not seen.”  Found in Hebrews 11:11.   Faith keeps us hoping and hope is something else we can’t be without.  Without hope we perish….so we must keep our faith and hope and know that life will mend in its own time.

It is easy for someone else to tell us what we need to do.  True.  But, it is easier for them to help us, because simply,  their thinking is sometimes clearer than ours.  When we are down; we should not push others away, but,  it is a great time to allow ourselves to be taken in and given comfort from those who really care about us and have our best interest at heart.  It is not being a burden if another person wants to listen; just make sure you know the person really well.  Our friends and family have been given to us for a reason.

Sometimes when Life Isn’t Perfect; we must learn forgiveness and that “ain’t” always easy…… How do we learn to forgive  someone or something that has happened when it seems to have taken our life away?  We start by knowing that we have hurt others also and that to be forgiven; we must forgive others also.  Nope, there is no way around this one and if you can’t forgive;  you will at some point wish you had.  If you dare to run sometimes someone has done in the ground and do not let go of the anger; it will torment you to death and finally destroy you.  It happens….believe it and though it may take time to forgive; it will set you free from the past.  It will give you a different outlook on life and help you want to go forward….with hope and faith.

Why Aren’t You Happy? October 5, 2010

Posted by izzyholt in Motivation.
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Most people today forget that happiness is a frame of mind, not a connection with another soul and that is why we asks; Why Aren’t You Happy?  This could be the very reason because so many individuals only believe they are happy along as they have someone besides them to fill the void.  Some do not know why they are unhappy, they just are.  Some just mosey along and don’t think much about it one way or the other.  At any rate; live will go on even when there is no one around us…so….get with it and take a look inside that soul of yours and find out just why you aren’t happy.

Some individuals get into a rut of living their life;  like a merry-go-round.  They just go round and round without taking the time to analyze if they are living their life to the fullest.  This isn’t acceptable for anyone because life become a bore then and people do all sorts of things when they are bored.  It is believed that one must first see their need to change their life; before it is beneficial to do so or before they can begin.

If one suddenly realizes they are unhappy, they should then seek within themselves for a clear stance on what is making them unhappy.  It is hard to know sometimes and seem fruitless.  Once we realize we “might” be unhappy; we must truly realize that another person cannot make us happy.  Our happiness is solely dependent upon us, our stance on our life and how we live it.  Happiness comes from within and it is based upon our view of how we are living our life.  Are we living life to the fullest?  Are we just surviving?  Are we doing something good for mankind?  Do we feel complete in that we do not feel alone?  Are we sharing our life with others in a positive way?  Can we change something that needs changing to help us feel the happiness we feel we are lacking? Are we really living our life in full swing or we muddling through it out of repetition?  Are we stuck?  Are we insecure in some way?  Are we sure we are unhappy?

There are many more questions we might need to ask ourselves and answer honestly.  Why Aren’t You Happy, is one of those that should be an hones assessment.  Being honest with ourselves makes us honest with others.  Seeking more wholeness within ourselves, means that we do not depend upon someone else to make us happy.  We know that we are a whole person even when no one is around to hold us up.  We can stand straight and tall as we are confident that we are doing our best and we know who we are and what we stand for and those things are all good. 

We have all seen people who seem to have it all.  Every time you see them; they are in the best mood and life seems to be so good for them.  Or, have they just learned, that we are what we project?  If you desire to be happy; act happy.  If you want to appear to be happy to others, act as though you are and before you know it; you will be.  Same way with words.  We are what we speak; if we speak negative things; they very well may turn out negative.  Life sometimes throws us a curve but in the end, it is not the curve that gets us; it is the way we handle the curve. 

Why aren’t you happy?  Don’t know?  Try acting like you are and see what happens….chances are you might find out that you are happier than you think.

Life Success January 11, 2010

Posted by izzyholt in Motivation, Self Help.
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Life is life and you just have to deal with it.  How many times have you heard this statement about Life Success?  I am sure we could all answer, many times.  My guess is that when we hear this kind of statement, it is because we have been handed a disappointment of some kind within our life that is making things complicated. We have somehow encountered something in our “life”, our efforts to live our life, like we need to, a stumbling block maybe, but at any rate something which disrupted our vision.  We need a vision for our life if we are to work appropriately toward the end results.

All of us know that “Life” is life…we have bridges to cross, mountains to climb and pursuits we call mistakes.  If we did not have these kinds of things in our life on our path through “Life” and in our endeavors to what we call “Life Success”, how could be feel a sense of accomplishment?  We could not, because even before we stated on our journey, we knew we would have to untake disappointments, roads less traveled and those things we call after thoughts or should I just say; mistakes.  We have a journey that is ours alone.

Life Success is many things to all of us and “life” itself is something we could write a book about and putting the two together, gives us much to think about.  This thing call “Life” is not prejudice to anyone.  We can all become what we want to, if we work at it and if we are disabled in anyway.  We have a mind to learn and a spirit to guide us to where we see fit.  First things first; “Life” is not a game, playing with “Life” is what causes so many people, I think to feel they have failed.  Our Life Success is no different.  If our performance is poor, we will only have poor results and Success -Through our Performance  is how it is all measured. I realize that a lot of people have fun while they live and work on their Success; nothing wrong with living life to the fullest and having fun.  There are certain rules we must  follow to accomplish certain desires and one of the first is having a clear vision of what where we are headed. 

A clean vision means that we have our priorities in order, we know or think we know what we need to make us feel the end result of accomplishment in our life.  It seems that those who have a loving family know that to be successful, they must first fulfill the needs of their family.  It just doesn’t work any other way…No Life Success is worth losing something as important as their family.  Secondly, most Life Success individuals have “self awareness”, they know who they are and do not allow someone else to dictate how they should view life.  They do not lower their values or their integrity for anyone or anything.  The facts are the facts, the rules are the rules and bending the rule usually brings about undesirable consequencies.   Thirdly, Life Success people know that they can produce a better end result with letting others help them and that their knowledge can be made even more potent by utilizing other people’s experience also. Not any of us know all their is to know…or we would be genius…and not many of us are.

I have watched a lot of Life Success people in my career and usually you find those that stand out the most are those that enjoy promoting and giving credit where credit is due.  They do not seek all of the attention for themselves, but they enjoy making others feel good about their accomplishments as well as their own.  It is really not all that hard to do.  Most people are struggling with something.  Most people try to do a good job, so therefore giving someone acknowledgement of a job well done only takes a few words and can mean so much.  When we see people who can give others encouragement we know they possess a character that shines.

Life Success is free for all, with motivation, endurance and determination.  If we let our inner spirit give us the right directions in the process.  No other individual owes us anything but respect, we owe others nothing but respect.  It is up to us to act respectful and build our life on principles of trust, integrity and high values.  When we lower our standard to become Successful, we endanger everything that represents true “Life Success”.